Do you want fries with that misleading sentence?

As someone pursuing an advanced degree in English Literature, I often am viewed as a Grammar Nazi or that old bag who stood in front of your fourth grade class and diagrammed sentences. Alas, I am neither of these things, and could generally give two shits less how well-spoken you are.

On the other hand, I assume that you’re using words that make sense. Which is why, when I passed by America’s favorite fa(s)t food joint today I began muttering and slapping my palm against my forehead. Their sign read:

Monopoly is back!

1 & 4 win!

It took me a few minutes to figure it out, but once I realized that what they said was not at all what they meant, it began to become clear. They didn’t mean “one and four,” they meant “one in four.” As in 25%. Instead, the dipshit who put up the plastic letters used the ampersand instead of the word “in,” and consequently made me think (albeit for a brief, fleeting second) that if I went in and ordered my go-to, the Big Mac, the #1, that I’d win something. Thanks for crushing my dreams, asshole.

In lieu of a more structured rant on the death of our language, I will leave you with a comic (that I believe someone sent me after reading one of the blog entries here, but I forget, so my apologies for not crediting you) that says it a lot better than I can.

 

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