Your Baby is Not a Backpack. Or a Dog.

When I was a little girl, my mother held my hand and carried me in her arms. Apparently, this has gone out of fashion. What do we have instead? The baby leash and the turn-your-child-into-a-knapsack-sling-thing.

These contraptions are now around to keep your rugrats in tow. C’mon! Really? Have we really lost so much touch with our children in the name of convenience that it has become okay to wear them or treat them like domesticated animals? I don’t know where to begin. This kind of behavior makes people look like lazy, disengaged, preoccupied parents; granted, some of them are. Others are just following the trend. Either way, this is totally unacceptable. How can children interact with the world from a knapsack? And how can they learn to listen and obey the instructions of a parent when you let them run amuck on a leash like a poorly trained terrier?

It’s worth mentioning that the baby backpack above is pretty tame. Some are slightly more strange:

The contraptions that let your kids’ legs dangle around seem somewhat unsafe, and the hiking pack is, admittedly, just weird. And way too intense. But sometimes they also verge on cruel.

There is nothing okay about hanging your kid up like a coat!!!! NO.

The baby leash isn’t much better. There is no reason you should be using the same item to keep track of your kid that you do to keep track of your dog/cat/ferret.

This woman is literally sixteen inches from her child. HOLD HIS HAND, LADY. HE'S NOT A POMERANIAN OR A YORKSHIRE TERRIER. HE'S A FREAKIN' BABY!!!!

And if that’s bad, how about being so lazy that you don’t even want to hold onto a leash? Well, there’s a product for you, too. It’s like a double sided lazy person dog leash.

I thought we learned our lesson as Americans that front belly wear of any kind is a huge fashion faux pas (see the “fanny pack”). I guess when it’s a two way leash for you AND your baby, it suddenly becomes acceptable….

To sum up, remember that your baby is a baby. Not a pet. Not a pile of books to throw on your back. You have a living, breathing child that greatly benefits from interacting with you and with the world around them with your guidance. Stop depriving them of this chance by backpacking and leashing them!

2 thoughts on “Your Baby is Not a Backpack. Or a Dog.

  1. Oh man. I am ok, I suppose, with a hiking backpack to hold your baby if you’re going on a serious hike, but the baby leash I am NOT ok with. I get really angry whenever I see babies or kids or really anything that’s not an animal on a leash. If you are a mom, be a mom. Not a pet owner.

  2. Pingback: My Solution To Off-Leash Park Debates « B.L.O.G.

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